What do you call a cow that doesn't produce milk? a milk dud!
I have the breath of life...and a penis
I like my women like i like my whiskey... ...locked down in my basement
My girlfriend says she's done masturbating all day. i couldn't be happier.
What's the difference between a taxidermist and a werewolf? a werewolf can only grow on its back.
What's the difference between a black man and a bench? the bench can support a family.
*falls off of gondolier* *plummets to the ground* *spoonful of champagne*
I'm not a sniper, i'm just a shot with a longbow.
