Chuck norris invented the spoon because he found it easier to mix drinks with his beer.
What do you get when you cast a large boulder into the ocean? a clear view.
I like my women like i like my whiskey... 12 years old and mixed up with coke.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? russel
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? you can't fish with a guitar
What do you call a black guy flying a plane? a pilot, you racist!
So i was in a restaurant on the weekends... and i just ordered the wwii remote
I blew 100 bucks in a vending machine. now i have $35 in student loans.
Why did the vampire miss work? he was feeling a bit of a snooze.
What are the two saddest words you can say to a parrot? i don't know, you just parrot.
What did the mexican do after he lost his car? he sued it for $200 million
I had to ban facebook it turns out i was too emotional.
What did the prawn say to the other prawn? could you please cut it open?
You said you were a nt.mod? i'm a mod and you're not allowed to be one.